Live and Let Live- In Defence of Audrey

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I have been out of the loop over this Andrew- Audrey thing, but one thing I know is that it is old news right now. We have moved on to greener things like. However, I was having a light banter with some bible-thumpers the other night and I couldn’t help but feel bilious by the height of the moral stool they have taken up. The sanctimony that they sometimes exude- I find it yellow. They hide behind scriptures to conceal their duplicity; more reason why I prefer spirituality to religion.

To be honest, I am old fashioned when it comes to matters of sex and sexuality. I believe in nature taking its course, thus I squirm on my chair every time I see a man rubbing the thighs of another on television- Spartacus and the ilk. With the same reserve, I see no reason why a man would want to change into a lady. I mean, with all the baggage that comes with womanhood, both literally and metaphorically.

Nonetheless, I choose to live and let live. I turn and look the other way when Adam and Steve are having a moment by the roadside, or when my neighbor dresses like a girl, wears weave and make-up, but has an Adam’s apple that stretches from here to Timbuktu.

My beef with my saved brethren isn’t about whether it is right or wrong to change your sex. I have a problem with their reasoning that God would be angry if someone changes what he made- it’s like challenges His authority or mocking His creativity. In my opinion, medical innovations like sex change are an expression of God’s brilliance, isn’t it? Ama, did we get the wisdom to change gender from simply partaking of the forbidden tree?

I remember one of them quoted a bible verse about being fearfully and wonderfully made- that we are all perfect. If it is so, then why did Jesus heal the crippled? Weren’t they wonderfully made too? Or better yet to bring my point home, if it is sacrilege to change the form in which a person is made, then we are all sinners- we dye our hair, go to the gym to change our physique, women pop pills to increase their ‘strongholds’ and bleach their complexion from black to yellow. In their wisdom therefore, all these qualify as sin. Thus half of the saved peeps I know should just as well start fornicating, because either way they do not make the cut to heaven’s shortlist.

In any case, our legislation regime is crystal about these things. Article 27 of the Katiba strongly abhors discrimination of whatever for, the Mental Act and Public Health Act also back it up in their own rights.

Personally, I am nauseated by the idea of removing exchanging genitalia from male to female. I feel my manhood diminish as I listened to Andrew say how he is planning to undergo the procedure that entails creating a love hole where an anaconda once coiled.

God knows I relish being a man. I do not envy having a day of the month, cramps, and labor pains. I enjoy my time in the little boys’ room. I prefer peeing while standing- you know, watching your piss make that long protracted curve; and the little struggle that we go through just to shake off the remaining water, when it is a notoriety that however much pressure you put, the last drop will always be on your pants.

If any of those vilifying Audrey on her life choices were to open a serious conversation on this topic, you will realize very quickly that they are the proverbial uninformed empty debes. Sex and gender are not the same thing; sex has got a lot with your role in procreation. Whether you are male or female. Gender, is all about conformity with societal norms of masculinity and femininity- like how men and women dress, talk, walk et cetera. So those calling Andrew a transsexual person must be have their ignorance framed and hung on their living room wall.  He is transgender- until he loses his disco stick doodle.

Who can forget the most iconic cinematic fish family of all, Nemo and his dad? Well, here is a little something for the funnies: Clownfish can change sex, they’re able to keep their species going. When a male clownfish pairs with another male clownfish (all clownfish are born male), one of them will simply turn female so that the two can spawn. When the female dies, the largest male in the area will take her place by turning into a female. Then, one of the more dominant nonmating males will begin mating with her. Well, let’s just say that any future sequel to “Finding Nemo” might include a somewhat awkward heart-to-heart between father and son.

Moral of the story; the animal kingdom as paved way for human beings.

The society is quick at maligning intersex personalities. Cases of abuse of intersex personalities are not alien in Kenya. One Richard Muasya was awarded Ksh. 500,000 in damages for being put in a male prison where he suffered irreparable humiliation and indecent assaults. Alexander Nthungi, a cross dresser in Thika was awarded Ksh. 200,000 in damages when the Thika Police stripped him down in the full glare of flashing and streaming cameras to ascertain whether he was a man or woman. Their excuse? They wanted to determine which cell to lock him up in. Question is; does money compensate the damage done to either of the people?

Kenya is a highly phobic society and a pretentious one too. We live in a civilization that condemns abortion, but looks down upon teenage parents. The people who are quick to condemn Audrey and her kind to hellfire for their life choices are irresponsible fathers, unfaithful wives, greedy MPs and crack heads who wear sanity up their sleeves. They are perverts who defile 12 year olds, and spend more time on with their hands on their crotch with their minds lost in some erotic hallucination. They are priests satiating their feeble needs with the slit on the back of small boys, pastors who rape in the name of Jesus, and governments that preach peace but endorse wars. These are the people that cast the first stone on Audrey, whose only crime was to feel misplaced in the body that they were born into.

This same society will lynch Audrey on Facebook, Twitter and blogs, claiming that trans-sexuality is a Western ideal that has pervaded our nation- as if the prostitution, abortion, doping and the doggy-style sex position that it engages in are African cultural phenomena.

All I am saying is simple. Put aside your conceited piety. The cross dressers, transgender, lesbians and gays should be allowed to do whatever they want. Cut Audrey Mbugua some slack.  The bad thing about putting yourself on a high moral high ground is that you will have further to fall.

So learn to live and let live. Life is way too short to mind other people’s business.


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  1. Gilbert Mwangi on

    Well argued piece.
    I particulary like the bit that sex and gender are two different things altogether.

  2. Gilbert Mwangi on

    Well argued piece.
    I particulary like the bit that sex and gender are two different things altogether.

  3. Gilbert Mwangi on

    Well argued piece.
    I particulary like the bit that sex and gender are two different things altogether.

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