Browsing: Bachelor Diaries

Bachelor Diaries
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The patient

So what is this nonsense about you going to where you grew up for Christmas and catching malaria, eh? Your entire life, you have never caught malaria. Then you spend a week in Nyanza and all of a sudden the whole medical profession cannot have peace? There is no way your home could have given you malaria, not after 28 years. Kwani which mosquitoes have been biting you your whole life? Ai. Chokeee! What kind of upside-down science are they teaching in universities these days? Or is your name no longer Magunga?

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When I first met Phyllis, she belonged to my elder brother. I had seen Nimrod…

Bachelor Diaries
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Stephan’s War

When she had come to grips, I remember Mama Steph finding Achamin and I standing on the hallway. I remember her telling Achamin, “When we were in the car, I told you that my boy was leaving, and you refused to believe me. Do you believe me now?” Achamin could not find the tongue to respond. I remember thinking how unfair that question was – but then again, what part of losing a 4-year-old son is fair? Life always seems unfair to those who have never met death.

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All I could think of is, enyewe in this our Nairobi the only loyalty you can ever be sure of are the loyalty points you earn in supermarket card.

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The point here is that surviving Nairobi without being conned is an extreme sport. An average Nairobian is in a constant state of thief-dodgery. But you know what? At least all these kleptos want is money. Money can be made again.

Bachelor Diaries whatsapp
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Death by WhatsApp

It was like being in a WhatsApp group with one person. And I did not understand why she could not get it. There you are doing a monologue in someone’s DM and after going on and on with your TED Talk and nobody is responding, si you should know that person is not interested? And what’s worse was that at the time I was going through a writer’s block. This is the first post I am putting up in two months. But because God is a humorist, he denied me words and put them in the fingers of this woman.

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