A story is told of a man who is presently revered about his hey days in campus. For the sake of his wife and children, this hallowed man shall not be named. We shall simply call him Mheshimiwa. His campus exploits provide an interesting view of how things have changed in the dating circles. During his time, men did not get into relationships in order to get someone who will validate your existence, like we do today. Before you spill the proposal out of your mouth, you had better be at ease with the consequences. In his day, a girlfriend had responsibilities that went beyond sharing bed sheets.
Today, the script is different. The rules have changed. The only function of a relationship is sex and perhaps cohabitation. Any other thing is just details. One month later, your girlfriend no longer looks half as good at the morning coffee table as she once did at a bar counter. She looks more like a pirate than the libidinous mermaid you once caught. During that one month, you notice that your relationship was better in theory than in practise.
Contrast that with Mheshimiwa’s epoch. Then, a girlfriend had responsibilities that went beyond the bed sheets. Mr Big-shot here was quite known for disciplining his girlfriend while they were in campus for reasons that would probably make FIDA women have your neck for dinner these days. For example, his girlfriend was expected to prepare bathing water for him- steamy but not sweltering hot. Just the way he liked it. While he was bathing, she pressed his clothes and made him tea. Remember, these are two people who attended the same classes.
Tell that to a girl in campus today and see the way they roll their eyes so far back as if picturing the roof of her skull. Girls in campus today are the kind that quote their constitutional rights to your face, and have Maendeleo Ya Wanawake’s number on speed dial. They do not have time to take care of their man. Hell, where will they get the time when they don’t even have time to laugh at a simple joke- they say “LOL”?
I wish one of them would be taken back in time to be Mheshimiwa’s girlfriend, and then do as much as nag him while listening to Habari at 7pm. Maybe then, they would understand what it means to be Shebeshed. Those were the days when lanes meant something. Women were treated like form ones- only to be seen and not to be heard.
However, this is the 21st Century. Times have changed, and what we once knew as ‘disciplining’ is now called ‘battery’. Cursed is the man who raises his voice at a woman, for he will lose his nuts.