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The Axe Factor

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Women are generally attracted to men who show that they can take care of themselves. Forget financial security and the weight they can hold up in the gym. What good is a Mandingo who bites his nails, doesn’t bathe and walks around with a vile reek of a week’s worth of sweat? Money may sweep a lady off her feet, but it cannot afford personal hygiene. That requires extra effort.  To ladies, being an Alpha man is more than just being male- it’s the entire package. Girls have a checklist- is he tall enough, is he smart enough, what car does he drive, does he carry an alligator skin wallet and something from Patek Phillipe? In the end, and let’s not deny it, they usually fall for the dude with a better résumé.

So, wooing a lady is essentially like applying for a job- and what gets you hired is how you set yourself ahead of the pack. A man’s scent quickly rears its head here. There’s something mystic about a scent of a man. Whether it’s the exhilarating aura of fresh white bed sheets or the scent of a passer-by on a busy street, it makes her feel alive and intrigued.

The trail of scent that a man leaves behind when he passes by a chic quickly places him at a pedestal depending on whether it is stale sweat, overly rambunctious or sexy. A man’s scent makes him memorable. It defines him in the same measure as his choice of drink, car and hairstyle.

And that is what Axe does.  A lady rarely forgets an Axe fragrance. I have had my fun share of scents since high school, and for a long time I was a Shirley May and Rasasi fanatic; until Axe ads hit the airwaves. They are kind of had to ignore, and they fed my curiosity to try it out; especially the tennis one.

See in campus, guys do not use body sprays for ourselves. We use them primarily for the opposite sex. In a market infiltrated by effeminate brands and others that excite allergies at first whiff, Axe stands out. It arouses a wild reaction to the woodiness in the air. Its husky warmth hits the right chords for the women folk; and take this for me because I am an Axe man myself, who only came to this realization after losing articles of my clothing to a girl- my scarf and jumper. That is what its creators refer to as The Axe Effect.

Axe is more than just an intoxicating scent. For those not blessed with the gift of a silver tongue, it is your wing man in the dating circles; your trusted sidekick who gives you an edge over the rest of the guys. It pats your back and tells you to go get that chic that you may think is out of your league. It elevates your confidence to the level that some lateral thinkers would regard as overconfidence. However what these people fail to understand is that with Axe, failure finds its way outside the window.

It does not really matter if you do not meet the societal standards of the typical hunk- tall, dark, handsome and all that jazz. Axe levels it all out. It has a bewitching magnetic pull that will have the babe juxtaposed across the bar. All you need to do is to tell her tongue-in-cheek that her dress makes her a tonic for weary eyes, and then ask her if she would like to take the party somewhere else a little bit more private. She will be torn between playing hard to get, and ravishing you so viciously at the counter. Don’t worry though, the Axe effect will place the odds in your favour- but since Axemen are gentlemen, we don’t kiss and tell. Whatever happens in Vegas stays in Vegas.

I have had the pleasure of sampling two of their top brands in Kenya; Axe Excite and Axe Dark Temptation. They were handed over to me by a lady (fully clothed) in an office that had red bras hanging from the walls and door knobs. Don’t ask.

Axe Excite; this is the one that enthused the loss of my scarf and jumper. Its gentle masculinity makes it a favourite amongst the ladies folk. Most people associate men to cold mechanical things, but sometimes all a lady needs is warmth and tenderness. Excite incites passions that make angels fall.

Dark Temptation is a luxurious and lust worthy fragrance. It’s wickedly delicious odour is inspired by the alluring nature of chocolate. Girls love chocolate. Their receptors have a high affinity for brown and sugary sweets. Its tagline is as irresistible as chocolate. Personally, it has become my personal favourite. Not because it makes me crave for a chocolate bar, but because of its rarity. Not so many guys in my campus use it, and I am not a fan of anything that is too conventional or mainstream. Conformity has never been my brand of vodka. That plus its sinful appeal to the fairer sex. I first wore it last week, and since then, hugs last a tad longer (and tighter) than they used to. And when I listen closely, I can hear a soundtrack of mayhem thundering between the ladies’ legs.

Since its invention in France in 1983 by Unilever, Axe has become one of the most successful man-grooming body sprays. Its inventors have long since pushed the envelope past its limits and developed shower gels as well as tantalizing sprays for women too. Several other Axe fragrances have been designed, but the Axe Effect has stoically weathered the storms of time, and after three decades of genius innovations, the lanky hands of time have only managed to set it above the rest. Its richness and complexity in its brands make ladies fly over to the moon and back; giving men the confidence and chivalry to play in the dating game. All this for  consideration of only Ksh. 350!

To celebrate three decades of fresh essence, the peeps from Unilever have put together a jamboree that is Saturday at the panoramic Aqua Blue Lounge. It will be an exclusive party that will fete the sexiest shadow dancers, the stunning Avril, the elegant Joey Muthengi and sensational DJ Protégé on the decks. And get this; drinks will be on the house! You don’t have to spend squat. All you have to do is simply show up looking good and rocking the tantalizing Axe fragrance ready to make the city under the sun come alive. There is no better way to spend a Friday.

This will not be a party for anyone to sit pretty and nurse a drink. There is no place for party-poopers and revellers who cannot handle their drink either. It is a bash to meet the beautiful people that Nairobi has to offer, have mad fun with them, make the Aqua Blue Lounge happen, and perhaps walk away with a catch or two.

To get an invite, all you have to do is click on the Axe Party banner at the top corner of the page (from a computer). It will redirect you accordingly. Alternatively, you could tune in to Kiss TV, Homeboyz Radio and Capital FM.

See you there, axemen.

About Author

I drink and write things.

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39 Comments

  4. Tony on

    Good one G… z there something extra for one with an Axe t.shirt, an axe shower gel n an axe spray… Maybe a v.i.p reservation for me hehe!! Anyway I like

    Reply
  9. Chess on

    In the words of deLewaz who introduced me to this very awesome scent,” you can never go wrong with AXE”…. Just like you never go wrong withTheRealG with words………

    Reply
  10. Winnie on

    i wouldn’t want to miss out….Axe is so sexy, i might get wet from merely sniffing it across the room

    Reply
  12. Prezzo on

    Nice work G….Naona Axe pia imekutambua. Keep it up. And since i do not have a comp, I wont be able to come to the bash? Damn. always wanted to see Avril upclose

    Reply
  19. Ademba Dennis Rocco on

    Axe Excite should just be known as AXCITE ….BWANA names of products have to carry some swag…remind this guys to get CHROMED as well…as usuall…u kill it my good man..trusted sidekick tena hehe!

    Reply
  22. Chérie on

    ‘They are kind of HAD to ignore’ *commits grammarcide*
    Other than that, I’m tempted to ea axe if its this good! 😀

    Reply
  26. Kevin Ratigah on

    Am in, just give out tha damn ticket. Brave work btw Magunga, this article deserves is worth it…and deserves hard cash too lol.

    Reply
  30. godie the farmer on

    Nice article n the äxe advert deserves a toast…..am i coming to the axe event??boss plizz damn sure i am

    Reply
  33. Job - Koreive benayahu ayov on

    super Axe whaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!! it works even after 3 decades hehehehehehehehe

    Reply

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