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    Look, it’s not that I wanted to do a sex tape.

    But all the conditions were optimum for said recording.

    First of all, there was Wifing and dining – and by this I mean the Jakom Wireless was running at maximum efficiency (meaning everything was being downloaded and my applications were all being updated). The dining consisted of a tea masala beef stew that I didn’t see coming and yet turned out so well that I didn’t even know there was tea masala in the beef.

    Then of course, there was the 48 inch Samsung TV in the middle of the room. It dwarfed everything else (though not the well planned seduction). People who think size doesn’t matter haven’t met electronic products from South Korea.

    Excellent company in the form of Mukundi, Jakom himself and a tall glass of something dangerous resulted in the concoction of a plan I hadn’t anticipated.

    You see, our fourth guest that night (the one from South Korea) has this amazing ability to mirror everything you tell it to do. Basically, you can make the TV tape you as you’re doing whatever you’re doing, – and it shows on the screen! – whether this is trying to imitate Mukundi’s slightly drunken dance moves or other things on the agenda.

    You can mirror the screen or pair your phone with the TV so that you play songs (Sexual Healing, Nishike, such things for this appropriate occasion) from your phone – literally make playlists, watch shows, read your messages – on the huge screen in front of you. What’s a girl not to like?

    Let’s just say, clothes came off. Ok, they didn’t. But it’s a good story, right?

    If you come to Sarit this Saturday, we can shoot our own video.


    Abi pursues freedom, happiness and sleep in that order.

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